Remember back when the Xbox was going to be a gigantic X? Believe it or not, that’s the least of the ludicrataculous information surrounding the billion dollar development of that trendsetting console. Such as some of the names that were floating around for the original DirectXbox.
In an article on EDGE where they chatted to original team behind the console, Seamus Blackley revealed a list of Xbox names that were so damn awful, that it’d most likely result in you rolling your eyes out of the back of your head if you read some of the marketing suggestions that were thrown around. Consider yourself warned. Here’s the list:
- MAX (Microsoft Action Experience)
- AIO (All In One)
- MIND (Microsoft Interactive Network Device)
- FACE (Full Action Center)
- MITH (Microsoft Interactive Theatre)
- XON (Experience Optimised Network)
- MVPC (Microsoft Virtual Play Center)
- TAC (Total Action Center – discs/games could be called TACs)
- MARC (Microsoft Action Reality Center)
- LEX (Live Entertainment Experience)
- M-PAC (Microsoft Play and Action Center)
- RPM (Real Performance Machine)
- MOX (Microsoft Optimal Experience)
- E2 (Extreme Experience)
- MTG (Microsoft Total Gaming)
- VIP (Virtual Interactive Player)
- PTP or P2P (Powered To Play)
- VIC (Virtual Interactive Center – disks/games could be called VICs)
- MARZ (Microsoft Active Reality Zone)
- TSO (Three, Six, Zero)
- EHQ (Entertainment Headquarters)
- O2 (Optimal Ozone or Optical Odyssey)
- MIC (Microsoft Interactive Center)
- R&R (Reality and Revolution)
- MEA (Microsoft Entertainment Activator)
- AMP (Active Microsoft Player)
- VPS (Virtual Play System)
- MAP (Microsoft Action Play)
- MEGA (Microsoft Entertainment & Gaming Attendant or Microsoft Entertainment & Gaming Assembly)
- CPG (CyberPlayGround)
- VERV (Virtual Entertainment & Reality Venture)
- OM (Odyssey of the Mind)
- P2 (PowerPlay)
- IS1 (Interactive System In One)
- MET (Microsoft Entertainment Technology or Microsoft Entertainment Theatre)
Thankfully, we wound up with Xbox in the long run. Which is nowhere near as the name chosen for the Atari Jaguar. A console which 60% of the time, still refused to work properly all the time.
Last Updated: July 8, 2013
Admiral Chief Groot Wors
July 8, 2013 at 09:04
Sjoe, cheese factory right there!
Melasco
July 8, 2013 at 09:05
ROFL @ RPM
Jonah Cash
July 8, 2013 at 09:39
Hey that is what my wife calls me…… Hahahahahahahaha!!!
Admiral Chief Groot Wors
July 8, 2013 at 09:44
She calls you ROFL?
Jonah Cash
July 8, 2013 at 10:27
Hahahaha!! Well played sir…..
Admiral Chief Groot Wors
July 8, 2013 at 10:38
So you whip it out and she rolls on floor laughing?
😛
Admiral Chief Groot Wors
July 8, 2013 at 09:06
Some of those names make my face do this…
Brady miaau
July 8, 2013 at 09:35
I had a cat I used to walk in the garden, on a harness. We loved it, our little activity.
and my cat used to make strange faces, but he used to run into the danger as opposed to away. The only thing he hated was big dogs, would jump up on me.
John Ambitious
July 8, 2013 at 09:15
AIO. All in one? Really?! That would’ve been funny.
Okay, so show me how you play old Xbox 360 games on it…
RinceWind
July 8, 2013 at 09:19
I am surprised TV isn’t on there… trololo!
Admiral Chief Groot Wors
July 8, 2013 at 10:38
HAHAHA
Trevor Davies
July 8, 2013 at 09:19
Wow. Some of those are terrible. I think we can all agree that Xbox is not a bad name.
Brady miaau
July 8, 2013 at 09:38
when compared to……
Umar Kiiroi Senk?
July 8, 2013 at 09:27
lol, Xbox FACE
More like Xbox FACE-PALM ……
Sir Rants-a-Lot Llew
July 8, 2013 at 09:28
Win!
Unavengedavo
July 8, 2013 at 09:50
It would have been FACE… All your friends would think that you are a douche for keep saying “IN YOUR FACE” when they asked how you play your games…
Sir Rants-a-Lot Llew
July 8, 2013 at 09:28
Lol. E2? Really? Who the heck thought THAT one out?
Brady miaau
July 8, 2013 at 09:33
Non volatile storage, E-Squared chip. Yeah, real high tech name
Unavengedavo
July 8, 2013 at 09:48
It would have been catchy. Just imagine the headlines…
SEE THE NEW E2 AT E3!
… or not
Brady miaau
July 8, 2013 at 09:59
E2Y2, new model astromech?
Sir Rants-a-Lot Llew
July 8, 2013 at 10:01
That needs to connect to a rebel database every 24hours or the ship it’s helping to pilot shuts down
Admiral Chief Groot Wors
July 8, 2013 at 10:43
XD
Ultimo_Cleric N7
July 8, 2013 at 09:36
Verv, Marz, Face and Mind are just plain terible. XboxOne suddenly seems ok. Eve nif they did borrow from Playstation.
Trevor Davies
July 8, 2013 at 09:43
Also, excellent reference to bittersweet symphony in the header image 😀
TiMsTeR1033
July 8, 2013 at 09:59
Those names are so bad its beyond sad! E2 and RPM and they seemed to
like action and center alot. I mean even the x box if we went back in
time, people could of thought its a porn device be like “jimmy have you
seen the *whispers* X……Box”?
Unavengedavo
July 8, 2013 at 10:00
The X is most likely for XTREME!!!
TiMsTeR1033
July 8, 2013 at 10:04
Knowing Microsoft yeah. be like that box is SOOOOOO EXTREME!!!!!! Guy shouts “so EXTREME IT LOOSES THE E AND BE XTREME!!!!!!”
Matthew Holliday
July 8, 2013 at 11:27
if they had called it Marc, i probably would have bought it instead of my PS3.
making it personal with a real name.
Major Commodore 64 Darryn B
July 8, 2013 at 12:12
No one got the Sex Panther reference. DISAPPOINTED!
The Fez
July 8, 2013 at 18:24
This is news now? Sorry, I missed the informative articles about Sony reactivating their Playstation TV patent and Sonys’ stance on always online DRM for their 4k video streaming top box…..
Jarrod Lane
July 8, 2013 at 20:18
XON ON… Oh dear lord