I’m almost done collecting Pokémon. Just a few dozen more of the pocket monster bastards to go, and I’ll have completed my Pokedex. I’ve detailed before how I’ve gone deep into the game, in order to fill my collection up with over 700 of the iconic monsters. I’ve made friends, surfed Reddit for kind souls and luck has certainly played a part. Or I could have just taken the easy route, and used a game exploit.
There are a lot of Pokémon out there in the regions of Kanto, Johto, Hoenn, Sinnoh, Unova and Kalos. Which is the biggest understatement ever uttered since the Apollo 13 space mission told Houston that they happened to have a problem. It’s gotten to a point now where capturing every single Pokémon in existence now means that you’re going to run out of storage space for the little critters in the game itself. Fortunately, that’s what Pokémon Bank is for, as it gives trainers some of that magical cloud stuff to help store their favourite captures. And if you’re a subscriber, you’ll be receiving some special Pokémon soon to add to your collection.
When we last left Darryn, he had ventured into the Viridian Woods, gotten hopelessly lost despite being told to walk in a straight line for five meters and was now on the verge of creating a new underground society where he would be king of the Metapods. All of the Kanto region would tremble before the immobile might of his new army! Hard fists, soft chins! The martial arts of passive resistance!
Pokkén Tournament, a Pokémon fighting game where battles have more than just four moves to choose from and infinite time, sounds like a ludicrous idea. Naturally, I must have it. Right now however, it looks like I’ll need to hop a flight on over to Japan to play the arcade brawler. A trip that will cost me many of thousands of Randelas and most likely financially hobble me for the rest of my life. But…Pokémon battling, guys. Pokémon battling.
Hoopa. It’s the name of a Pokémon that has been around since Pokémon X and Y, but has yet to be released. Unless you hacked the game that is. A legendary Pokémon, Hoopa is also linked to the recent influx of other legendary pocket monsters in the recent release of Omega Ruby and Alpha Sapphire. And it looks like Nintendo is finally unleashing their latest Pokémon officially.
Wonder Trading is a cool concept in Pokémon games. You get to trade any of your Pokémon, for a random one in return. In practice however, this most likely means that you’ll wind up with a low-level Zigzagoon. But what are the actual chances of this happening? One avid player has been keeping score on Wonder Trades, and surprisingly, the overall results paint a different picture.
By now, you’re more than aware of my obsession with Pokémon. But the less said about the Weedle tattoo on my lil’ Weedle, the better. Right now, I’m busy with a quest to complete the Pokedex. And I mean a total completion. Not only do I want to achieve a 100% rate before the year ends, I want to actually possess all of the Pokémon possible. Here’s how far I am right now.
I’m on a quest, to be the best, like no one ever was. Unfortunately, that involves being wonder-traded yet another f***ing Zigzagoon. But I digress. After six generations, the Pokémon games now feature very, very diverse wilderness areas. What was once an area populated by Tentacool and Magikarp now features Frillish, Remoraid and more f***ing Zigzagoon. I really, really hate that Pokémon. If you’re looking to catch ‘em all like I am, then here’s a handy guide on where to find your favourite pocket monsters.
Breeding. In human terms, it’s what happens when your parents decide to be naughty, with the repercussions being felt nine months later. In Pokémon terms, it’s a method of getting new critters, while starting from scratch with a potential contender that hopefully isn’t so inbred that it can’t stand straight in a battle. If you want to raise a true champ, you’re going to need to do some breeding. Here’s how you can play Gattaca with your Pokémon.
At its core, Pokémon is all about trading. It’s about swapping Pokémon in much the same manner that car keys are swapped at certain kinds of parties, except you’re happy when you wake up the next morning with a strange virus such as the Pokérus. To make that concept work, the various games have always had some form of trading, with Wonder Trading being a favourite amongst fans. It’s also a completely broken system.
Every Pokémon fan has their favourite generation. Whether you’re keeping it old school with the original 151 Pokémon from Red and Blue era, or experiencing the world of battle monsters and collecting in 2013’s Pokémon X and Y, there’s a generation for every taste. Pokémon Omega Ruby and Alpha Sapphire is one such generation, a remake of the third era games in the series, Ruby and Sapphire. And it’s pretty much my favourite Pokémon game ever made.
Look, I get you. You’re attached to that Magikarp you caught, and one day, Splash will be an effective attack. But sometimes, you need a little extra muscle. You need some power that can warp reality, create new continents and drown the world in too much water. What you need, is a legendary Pokémon. Well buddy, I got ya covered.
The latest games in the Pokémon series, Pokémon Omega Ruby and Alpha Sapphire are out in the US and Japan. In the three days since they’ve been available at retail, they’ve sold a combined total of over 3 million copies. That’s despite essentially being remakes of older games.
In case you haven’t heard, there’s a new Pokémon game out right now in the US of A and this Friday for everyone else. Also, I can see you hiding under the bed, and I need you to crawl out and listen to what I have to say. This stuff is important to me dammit! I’ve played a lot of Pokémon games over the years. Hell, I’ve probably played all of them. But over the next year, I’m going to attempt to do something which I’ve never done before. I’m going to…catch ‘em all!