The PS Vita finally gets a hyper big-breasted cooking-rhythm game in the form of Deka Mori: Senran Kagura

kagura

Let’s be honest here. As far as gaming has come in recent years to making ideas about playing as realistic humanoids who are less top-heavy and more interested in telling a good story, there’ll always be a Japanese studio leering around the corner, ready to throw something decidedly insane into that mix. And buddy, it doesn’t get more crazy than Senran Kagura series which has three new games on the way.

Before we get to the real meat of madness, a quick history lesson on the franchise:

bewbs

Yep, if you dig getting slapped for not looking at ladies face to face, then you’ll love this franchise. Senran Kagura follows the adventures of a group of ninja high school girls, with wacky hijinks occurring that sees them regularly stripped down as they lose precious clothing during various battles. Nose bleeds may occur from hardcore fans.

senran (1)

Moving on, there’ll be new adventures in fan service out soon. Senran Kagura 2: Deep Crimson is a sequel to the 3DS side-scroller that’ll actually have two male characters in it when it releases on August 7, while Senran Kagura: Estival Versus which has something to do with being a PlayStation format tile and will be available on sony-branded platforms.

senran (2)

And then there’s Deka Mori: Senran Kagura, which is all about cooking, with “huge food servings”. WINK WINK NUDGE NUDGE. Here’s the possibly not so safe for work video, due to the Baywatch level of jiggling that is present inside of it, for the game that Famitsu describes as a “hyper big-breasted cooking-rhythm game.”

I haven’t seen that much jiggling silicone since I got drunk in Beverly Hills and crashed a car into the back of a plastic surgery supply van. Naturally, I must have this game when it releases in late March. For you guessed it, research purposes.

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Author:Darryn Bonthuys

Because he's the writer that Lazygamer deserves, but not the one it actually needs right now. So we'll hunt him. Because he can't take it. Because he's not a hero. He's a loud-mouthed journalist, a watchful procrastinator. A dork knight.
  • Admiral Chief in Vegas

    Frodo loves dem ( . )( . ) in games

  • VampyricSquirrel Monk

    So I wonder how many games like this Frodo has bought for “research” purposes

  • Admiral Chief in Vegas

    Heh, catchy tune!

  • Devourer of Small Bunnies

    What the christmas christ is going on here??? 0.o

    • VampyricSquirrel Monk

      Anime boobies… not much else

  • Unavengedavo

    Regarding the header, I have watched… uh… heard about enough hentai to know where that is going…
    http://d24w6bsrhbeh9d.cloudfront.net/photo/azbg2qK_700b.jpg

    • RinceThis2014

      HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! WINNER!

  • Sir Rants A Lot Llew. Jelly!!!

    what the actual duck 0.o

  • Weanerdog

    lol’d “My tags are over here you perves” That was very um interesting

  • Hammersteyn

    So that’s how sushi is made

  • RinceThis2014

    And here ladies and gentlemen is why the aliens are staying the fuck away from us.

    • Hammersteyn

      I dunno, this seems like something aliens might release on the masses.

      • VampyricSquirrel Monk

        The Japanese are aliens? That explains a lot…

        • TiMsTeR1033

          They are a confused yet brilliant race

      • RinceThis2014

        I can think of 2 things. 1. The aliens already ‘seeded’ planet earth and are horrified at what has become of their offspring. Or 2, the Japanese government knows something we don’t about the ‘tastes’ of the greys watching us 0-O

    • Admiral Chief in Vegas

      LOOOOOOL

    • Kromas

      Not necessarily. Have you seen Paul?

  • Kensei Seraph

    I kinda want to watch the anime based on the game in that trailer… I blame the music.

  • Jim Lenoir (Banana Jim)

    Let me just throw the following at you all… DAY ONE PURCHASE!

    • Hammersteyn

      Hahaha, yeah why not. Luckily I can take the Vita somewhere so that I can research in private.

      • TiMsTeR1033

        Research I believe you!

  • Umar Appreciates Nier

    This was not the Senren Kagura game I wanted :(

  • Sageville

    What did I just read?

  • Gregory Opera

    Yeah, but like the other “Senran Kagura” games for the PlayStation Vita, this will not see a Western release… Nor does it feature English subtitles.

    Fail.

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