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Goat Simulator is an existential minefield

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Goat

I’ve been intrigued by the rather silly Goat Simulator since the developers first showed off its insanity. According our review, it’s little more than a bit of silly fun; a broken physics simulator inspired by tony Hawk, with a goat in it. Only that’s completely wrong. It has a story. And depending on how susceptible you are to Spontaneous Exploding Cranium Syndrome (SECS!), it could well blow your mind.

Over on the game’s Steam page, one fan offered a theory that the game was little more than a hallucination. One of the game’s developers though, clarified that its narrative went far beyond that. The goat is stuck in purgatory; the waiting lobby between heaven and hell.

Essentially, Goat Simulator is Existentialist art.

“Your goat is in Purgatory,” says Coffee Stain’s Armin Ibrisagic

If you notice you’ll see that one of the tunnels has a sign saying "Himlen" and the other has a sign saying "Helvete". If you pull that through google translate you’ll see that "Himlen" means Heaven, and "Helvete" means hell. That is why there is both a Devil Goat and an Angel Goat in the game.

That is why the pentagram is closer to the sign saying "Helvete", even the demonstration (symbolizing the current chaos in the Ukraine) is on that end of the map. Goathenge is closer to Hell, symbolizing the backwards and old ways of humankind that need to be destroyed for progress to be made, while the Low Gravity Testing Facility and the Beacon is closer to "Himlen", symbolizing research, progress, and hope. The trap once you go to space shows that we must not rush things before we are ready.

You might also notice that, no matter what you do, you can never interact with humans. If you lick them or even touch them a little bit, they will instantly go limp. If there are any humans nearby, they will run away from you. When it comes to other humans, you are always the onlooker, always staring from a distance, never part of the group. Always alone.

Somebody’s having a bit of laugh right? According to Ibrisagic this is all just the beginning, and there’s a greater existentialist rabbit hole n the game, for those that wish to pursue it.

This is just the tip of the existential iceberg, those who seek shall find more. I’ll let you analyze the new map yourself that’s coming with patch 1.1.

Last Updated: May 9, 2014

14 Comments

  1. Kensei Seraph

    May 9, 2014 at 15:34

    O_O

    Reply

  2. Umar Returns

    May 9, 2014 at 15:36

    LOOOOL I read this in the week, great stuff! Some creepypasta shit!

    Squall is dead is still my fav theory

    Reply

    • Dean

      May 9, 2014 at 15:38

      I thought Squall being dead was the forgone conclusion to the whole story. Or did I miss something?

      Reply

      • Umar Returns

        May 9, 2014 at 15:39

        It’s just a theory, it was never confirmed. Or was it?

        Reply

        • Her Highness the Hipster

          May 9, 2014 at 15:40

          when does that stop being a spoiler alert? 😛

          Reply

          • Umar Returns

            May 9, 2014 at 15:42

            Lol agh, it happens at the end of disc one

        • Rincethis

          May 9, 2014 at 15:40

          Nope., Never was.

          Reply

        • Dean

          May 9, 2014 at 15:42

          Just thinking now, if I remember you see him with a hole where his face should be. If I look back at Dark Souls the giants have holes for faces. Wonder if there is some clue there….

          *twilight zone music*

          Reply

    • Sir Rants A Lot Llew. Jelly!!!

      May 9, 2014 at 16:57

      it’s also the most fitting theory #justsaying

      There is also the theory that Renoah is actually Ultimicia who captured and used time magic because of the death of Squall.

      She went on to live with him forever by creating the GF Griever which was the name of Squalls pendant.

      Dun Dun Duuuuuuun

      Reply

  3. Rincethis

    May 9, 2014 at 15:40

    I CALL MAAAAAASHIT!

    Reply

  4. InsanityFlea

    May 9, 2014 at 16:22

    I knew those goats where devious.

    Reply

  5. JamesRGarcia

    May 9, 2014 at 18:30

    Somebody’s having a bit of laugh right? According to Ibrisagic this is all just the beginning, and there’s a greater existentialist rabbit hole n the game, for those that wish to pursue it. http://num.to/4788-8183-4688

    Reply

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