Come one, come all, to the best weekly round up in this or any other of the 19 known universe! Including that one populated solely by bronies. Brrrr. We’ve got another scintillating wrap-up of good, bad and weirdenss for you today. And the best bit? It won’t cost you 800 MSP. So come on in!
It doesn’t matter what paltform you play on. Whether you’re officially recognised or not, or which game you’re playing. Because when you go toe to toe with some of the best gamers in the world and give them a beating that can only be classified in drunk Irish daddy terms, then you know you’re at the top of your game. Which is exactly what one local Battlefield 3 team did this week.
Even though I find it hard to believe that Microsoft would play Russians Roulette with all six chambers loaded, the idea of an Xbox 720 that tells second hand games to bugger off is indeed worrying. Will it happen? Who knows. Is it a crap idea? 100 Gamerpoints if you say yes.
Best ION Header
Amanda Klaasen, a ripped bikini, the beach and some tasteful logs obscuring the vision. What more could you ask for in life, oh Conans?
Yolanda was “this” close to clinching most comments with her take on gaming and love, but once again, Gavin beat her to the punch. David Jaffe probably still hates Gavin, but he hates ignorant CNN new reporters even more, as Erin Burnett found out in an article that had 60 comments by the end of the week.
But on the bright side (for me), Yolanda did claim her rightful place to the least comments throne, as her love for irradiated zombies only resulted in three frigs being given.
Batman of the week
I’d just had a harrowing experience being told that I was a horrible writer, despite the fact that I had clearly clinched the most impact on the site by being Batman for the entire week. Something which disturbed me greatly. More so than usual. Which resulted in the following conversation with my faithful Alfred, Geoff:
Bat-Darryn: Targeting me won’t get their comments back. I knew the trolls wouldn’t go down without a fight, but this is different. They crossed the line.
Geoff: You crossed the line first, fart-knuckle. You squeezed them, you hammered them to the point of desperation. And in their desperation, they turned to a griefer they didn’t fully understand.
Bat-Darryn: Trolls aren’t complicated Geoffatouille. You just have to figure out what they’re after.
Geoff: With respect Master Bater perhaps this is a man that you don’t fully understand, either. A long time ago, I was in Boksberg. My friends and I were working for the local municipality. They were trying to buy the loyalty of tribal Die Antwoord fans by bribing them with precious wheel rims. But their caravans were being raided in a suburb north of Kemptson by a bandit. So we went looking for the mags.
But in six months, we never met anybody who traded with him. One day, I saw a child playing with a mag the size of a Nissan. The bandit had been throwing them away.
Bat-Darryn: So why steal them?
Geoff: Well, because he thought it was good trolling. Because some men aren’t looking for anything logical, like sensible discussions. They can’t be bought, bullied, reasoned, or negotiated with. Some men just want to watch the world bronie.
The creepy thing is, Geoff did this in a flawless cockney accent. The whole time.
Best Header Image
We’ve had a really great week for header images in my opinion. Randy Macho Man Savage headlining the Ouya. Capcom perfectly summarised with Patrick Star. Jay and Silent Bob singing jungle love. The six million dollars sales man. But in my opinion, Geoff clinches it this week again with some clever wordplay, and Freddy Mercury.
“I should win, because I’m probably the only Romanian dude spending more time on a South African gaming website than I do in college. Yes, I truly am a Lazygamer.” That’s a comment from our Facebook page, which had us all in stitches, with regars to the Dead Space 3 comp that was run. Sure, it’s not from the main site, but then again, we can only handle so much of OVG’s madness before we start to look for markers. Banana.
Best Beyonce Image
Dis one from Yolanda. Oh, oh oh oh, oh, oh oh oh!
In this article
Because he's the writer that Lazygamer deserves, but not the one it actually needs right now. So we'll hunt him. Because he can't take it. Because he's not a hero. He's a loud-mouthed journalist, a watchful procrastinator. A dork knight.