Tonight on Top Gears of War! Gavin gets forced to play FIFA 2014: Manchester United Fan Edition! Geoff tries to not make a dirty joke for an entire 15 minutes! Zoe attempts to be Batman and I take the new Atari Jaguar for a spin around our track!
I don’t know about you, but I’m about as psyched as a piano wire salesman at an assassin convention about the idea of a sandbox Hitman game. I adored Hitman: Absolution, but if Square Enix can assemble a team to take that concept a step further into an even bigger world, then it can have all my money.
Stop it MSSA. Just stahp! We’ve had plenty of stories about the organisation and how they’ve got the habit of sticking their noses into events which shouldn’t concern them, but almost ruining the chances of a local team to compete in an international event for a game that they have absolutely no presence in whatsoever? Absolutely shameful.
Best ION Header
I think I’ve knocked out another great week for ION headers, thanks to my natural hatred for the female form by showing paid models who do this for a living as beautiful representations of the human body of a specific gender.
But Sunny Leone takes the most beautiful sexist cake this week, I reckon.
Geoff knocked out an article that earned him 210 comments this week, as everybody had something to say about SimCity and its decision to finally go offline, something which took six months to do.
Meanwhile, I got just a mere two comments for my cosplay video. Much like Julius Malema, I’m blaming those bloody agents and their counter-revolutionary agendas for this poor showing of feedback.
Batman Of The Week
VICTORY IS MINE (by 0.1%!)! Another week, another Friday where Zoe laments the fact that she’ll never ever win this award as long as either Geoff or myself is alive. I’d like to thank the Bat-academy, Alfred and Catwoman’s skintight latex outfit for helping me emerge victorious this week.
Header Image Of The Week
Dammit Geoff, you win. You freaking win, and it’s not because of my massive vanity that I declare it so. This image for the upcoming train wreck known as Rambo: The Video Game had me in stitches, a feeling that was mutual with anyone else who read it.
Comment Of The Week
Well done to the Admiral chief this week, for Erwinning comment of the week thanks to this exchange with Skoobaz:
Why is Hitman looking at Johannesburg on the flight board?
Admiral Chief in Vegas
To take care of an EFFing problem
In this article
Because he's the writer that Lazygamer deserves, but not the one it actually needs right now. So we'll hunt him. Because he can't take it. Because he's not a hero. He's a loud-mouthed journalist, a watchful procrastinator. A dork knight.